Forgiveness starts with Honesty with yourself and other's ....

Exercise in Honesty .....

I think sometimes it is easy to forget how much power there is in honesty. I mean real, no holding back honesty. The kind of honesty where you no longer lie to prevent from hurting someone, but instead you just speak truth. Even the kind of truth that hurts. Sunday morning after church I had a conversation with a friend that might be one of the hardest conversations I have ever had. She just sat down and started talking, barely taking the time to breathe & tear's pouring from her eye's. She chose to be honest with me instead of lying so that I wouldn't get upset. Much to her surprise, though, I was anything but upset. The sermon I just had received from Pastor Battle had greatly helped me in the way I was feeling in my heart by my friend's honesty with me. I greatly respected the courage and strength it took for her to say what she said to me. I greatly respect how hard it was to hurt me, and anger and hurt are two emotions I didn't feel.It was at this moment that I realized how much I've grown up. It surprised me that I was able to take what she said, and use it to grow and learn. It surprised me that I was able to love her even more for what she said that I did before she started talking. I'm grateful that God gives us hearts like His that are able to handle the truth from someone who loves us, and take it and turn it into an experience to grow from. I'm grateful that He transforms me in this way.

She was greatly hurt that being my best friend in the whole world that I had not came to her in my time of need. She felt I dismissed her as a friend that she could/would not be able to help me. She was greatly torn and felt I didn't think of her as s good enough friend to lean on, to cry on her shoulder, to reach to her to help pick me up when my soul was great pain & discomfort. We have been great friends for many years. We have raised our children together, shared love & laughs along the way but truth be told .. I didn't go to her this time out of embarrassment, I have always been the one to be the picker upper for my friends. I have always been the one to jump to the need of a friend, the shoulder to cry on, the support they needed in their low time's and was too ashamed to let the truth be told that I too am just like them, that I have fallen on the hard time's and grief and I am the one this time, depressed and down alone in my world and needed my friend's love, prayer's and support to get me through. Call it a matter of pride, call it my will & strength to prove that I can and will survive as I always have but I really didn't want to place my burden's on their heart's to worry about. I was and am willing to sacrifice and go with out before I will ask, beg or borrow to help me. In my life I have learned 2 thing's ... Never count on anyone for anything because I have found in my life ... everytime I COUNT on someone to do as they say they will for me, they let me down. And that the only one true one I have ever been able to rely on for being honest & true to my heart is God. He is the only one who I felt would always there for me.

The power of honesty cannot be matched. Yes, what my friend said to me caused my heart to break and caused silent tears to fall down my face.Yet, I am so glad that I know now. I am so glad that someone stopped taking the easy way out and exercizing obligation, and instead chose to let the truth be heard. It gives me the chance to change things. It gives me the chance to evaluate, and start over. It gives me the power to, in turn, start speaking more truthfully myself. There are things we all need to hear, and thank you JESUS that we have people to speak them to us. So take this as a challenge. Are you exercizing convienience in exchange for truth? Are you avoiding honesty so that someone won't get hurt? Are there people in your life that need to hear some truth that you have access to? People can't fix things they don't know they are doing wrong. Tell them. Be honest. You might be surprised at how much the truth can change things (and people!). This is my heart today. Take it or leave it :) {{{ TIGHT HUGS & ALL MY LOVE }}}